Ali Fedotowsky Blogs The Bachelor: Episode 5

January 31, 2012 at 4:18 pm , by

Hi friends! Welcome back :-) In last night’s episode, all of the girls got to go on a date with Ben, so I was happy for them—it would really stink to be in Puerto Rico and not be able to go out and explore. Speaking of tropical places, I just got back from the beautiful Casa Dorada resort in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico and I’m exhausted after an incredible trip with my girlfriends. So I apologize if my blog isn’t on point this time around, but I promise to make up for it next week!

I was really glad that Nikki got a date this week. I liked her the first night but we haven’t really gotten to know her since. Nikki seems really genuine and I loved seeing how relaxed she was with Ben. And even though I think it’s good that Nikki opened up about her marriage, I don’t think it’s a good thing to tell a guy that you had trust issues in your past relationship without going into more detail and explaining why you felt that way. I feel like that puts a warning sign in his head that says, “I’m going to lose my freedom if I get into a relationship with this girl!” I could be totally wrong, but that’s my observation based on my experience with guys. However, I will say that I thought their kiss was super passionate—heck, even I started blushing a little. I think Ben really likes Nikki, or at least really likes kissing her.

The group date this week seemed like a lot of fun. Baseball is such a great idea for a date and I’m all for a little healthy sports competition! I found it very interesting that Ben got to choose a woman to take on the night portion of the date, and it means a lot that he picked Lindzi. It’s not a rose, but in my opinion it’s much better. Usually roses are given to some people because you don’t want to be harsh and send someone home on a one-on-one date. And sometimes you give a rose on a group date to someone who you haven’t spent that much time with, so you want them to feel better by getting the rose. Believe me, there are hundreds of reasons why roses are given out. If who the roses were given to didn’t get switched up every once in a while, I would have given my group date roses to one of three or four guys every single time. However, giving Lindzi more “time” is much more special, and it shows that he wants to be around her and get to know her better. I’m not sure if this makes sense to you guys, but it makes perfect sense in my head, maybe because I lived through it.

On the group date Kacie B. got the rose. I loved when Ben gave her the rose and stated a bunch of reasons why he wanted to give it to her, because I think when he isn’t all that into a girl he’ll usually just say something like “I want to get to know you more.” Yay, Kacie B! I love her to pieces.

I think Elyse is a sweetheart, but I feel bad because I didn’t even know her name until this episode. That fact alone was enough for me to know that she wasn’t going to make it very far in this because the viewers didn’t even know her yet! It was very obvious to me throughout the date that Ben wasn’t feeling it. He wasn’t really talking to her and he was just repeating things she said. I also don’t think Elyse really liked Ben that much; I don’t think she was crying for him per se, I think it was more because she wanted to stay on the show and was maybe hoping for that fairy tale ending. In the end, Ben did the right thing. If you don’t feel it, you can’t force it.

Now here comes the really interesting part—Ben and Courtney skinny dipping. People often ask me if the girls can go to see Ben whenever they want and the answer is no, they can’t. So in this situation Courtney must have asked a producer if she could see him so they could skinny dip and they allowed it. Ben said she “broke the rules” but trust me, she got permission. Don’t you think the camera crew would have said something if she was breaking the rules? And Courtney knew exactly what she was doing by putting the idea into Ben’s head early on. (Plus, I think she saw the chemistry between Kacie B. and Ben and wanted to put a stop to it immediately.) In terms of Ben’s involvement, he’s a single man—of course he’s going to want to go skinny dipping with a model! Does that mean all men out there would do this? Of course not. I’m just saying that most men would have a hard time saying no to this especially since Ben is super into Courtney. I don’t think Ben would have done it with just any girl, and Courtney is a frontrunner so he decided to take advantage of the opportunity to get closer (uh, real close) to her. Would I have done it? Absolutely not. But that’s just me. Moving on…

I loved seeing Blakely open up at the cocktail party; that totally changed my opinion of her. To be honest, I don’t think Ben will end up with her but I think it’s the greatest gift in the world to find yourself and love yourself. I’ve recently gone through a similar situation and I feel like once you are totally happy just being you and knowing that you deserve all the happiness in the world, everything else just falls into place.

After that happy thought, let’s discuss a not-so-happy situation: Ben and Emily. Ben should not have told Emily to “be careful.” That was such a poor choice of words. Emily was simply looking out for him, but she wasn’t doing it or expressing it to him the right way. I know exactly what she’s going through, but after she apologized she shouldn’t have brought it up again because it just wasn’t necessary. As for Ben, I think he’s just getting tired at this point in the show and he doesn’t want to be influenced by others. Guys and girls are different in this regard. Well, I should say that Ben and I are different in this regard. On my season, I wanted the guys to tell me what I wasn’t seeing behind the scenes, but they never really did. It’s like they didn’t want to break the “man code.” However, women tend to feel the need to look out for the men they care about and be vocal about the women they think don’t have good intentions. Women don’t generally think of that as tattling, in my opinion at least. I would be interested to hear what you guys think.

And then there was the elimination. I know many of you are big Jennifer fans, including myself, but I was not surprised at all when she got sent home. Ben is not good at hiding who he is and isn’t interested in, and when he was talking to Jennifer at the cocktail party it seemed like he had nothing to say and the only way he could express interest in her was by kissing her.

After all of this craziness, I have to stick up for my boy Ben. In Ben’s defense this is a really tough point in the show. He’s been on many dates with the girls and I would bet that he’s definitely narrowed it down to his top three or four. So each goodbye is actually getting easier for him because he gets to narrow it down to the girls he really likes. At this point I think that Ben’s top three girls are Courtney, Lindzi and Kacie B. I want to believe that Kacie B. is the girl for Ben, but I feel like it looks too obvious. If it really is Kacie B. in the end, then I feel like the current episodes would be edited to trick us into thinking that it’s not her. But then again, things can always change and maybe they’re just showing us a true love story between them. They would make a perfect couple. Sigh. Okay loves, I need a nap after all of the fun I had in Cabo. Until next time…



85 Responses to “Ali Fedotowsky Blogs The Bachelor: Episode 5”

  1. I just hope Ben apologizes to Emily after he watches the show and realizes what she was trying to tell him about Courtney… someone needs to warn him!

  2. I love Kacie B and Linzi. I would be happy to see him with either girl. I too feel that the end choice will be Kacie B as she clearly cares for him more than anyother thus far. And it’s genuine.

  3. After watching Courtney so far on the bachelor I have to say she is vicious. What really stuns me is te fact that everyone who knows her, including Ben, will see this when it airs…. I don’t care what she says later about “editing”- you could t edit this much in.
    As for the skinny dipping- even though they are adults I hope Ben thinks about a woman that would so easily get so “close” with someone when he is dating so many other women, just sayin.

  4. Looking forward to next week when it seems some other girls tell Ben about what they are seeing with Courtney. Looks like some drama is gonna go down!

  5. I think he should be completely ashamed of his behavior with Courtney. All I could think watching last night was “if he doesn’t choose Courtney, can you imagine what his fiance’ is going through right now?” What torture!!

  6. I really hope that Ben sees Courtney for who she really is. I do not like this woman at all!!! If I had to pick who I wanted Ben to end up with it would be Kacie B. She is such a sweetie. For it Kacie B., you and Ben would make an awesome couple….

  7. I wish Ben could see Courtney as we all do. It’s gonna be another heartbreak for him if he chooses her in the end. My opinion, but I know I’m not alone. Lindzi or Kasey B would be a much better match.

  8. It will be Kacie. B. He’s totally into her. BUT she is probably devastated after watching last night’s show if they are together now. He’ll be eaten alive at the ‘Women Tell All’.

  9. Regarding the Emily situation, in her defense, it would be hard for me to witness such madness (Courtney), and not tell someone I care about who is clearly blind to it (not really his fault. However, I don’t understand why she would bring it up AGAIN, after becoming so upset and filled with regret and fear after the first time she brought it up. I agree Ben handled it the wrong way. He should have just thanked Emily and told her he’d rather find out for himself, (or something like that). I just feel that telling her to be careful is kind of putting Emily down. I wish that he at least realized her intentions were truly good ones.

  10. I have to agree with you Ali. I would think that Ben would want to know what is going on behind the scenes. I also think that woman tend to want to protect the man they care about. Courtney is stopping at nothing to get him. I was shocked that he skinny dipped with her. That was a no no in my book. I love Kasie B and Lindzi. They are my choices. I love the show

  11. I have a prediction. I have intentionally stayed away from spoilers because I like to go through it without knowing the end. In Jake’s season, I found out it was Vienna who won and it just made everything so frustrating.

    Anyway, I predict that Ben ends up with Courtney. I also predict that by the time we get to the ‘After the Final Rose’ portion, the two will have broken up. There is no word for what she’s doing with him other than “manipulating.”

    In any case, I think Ben is going to have to do a lot of redeeming himself in the long run. This season reminds me SO much of Jake’s season. It’s another sad case of a guy who came across so down-to-earth and wholesome, but who proved to be another guy who is thinking with his … well, you know. :-)

  12. Can’t stand Courtney!

  13. Ali you had very good points and I agree with you. I happened to go back and watch Ashley’s season and what Emily is doing to Ben, Ben wanted to do the exact same thing. Its amazing how he could forget about that!

  14. I have lost all respect for Ben for going skinny dipping with Courtney and not being honest with the other girls about it. If I was there and knew about it I would have NOT accepted a rose from him and walked away. No class in my opinion at all. Ali you where always honest in your season to the men even when it was not always in your best interest and I respected that so much. Ashley was honest too, so maybe it’s a “guy thing”, but that is a type of guy I wouldn’t want to be with…just saying…

  15. I think this show has run its course. Time for new ideas and less drama. I don’t like Courtney. My fav is Kacie B.

  16. I still can’t get over the comment that Courtney said, “winning, winning.” That is just terrible. Right there proves she is just not in it. I could tell by the way Ben was with Jennifer at the party too, he looked bored. My favs are Kacie B. and Lindzi. I really like Kacie she just seems so down to earth, and really cares for him. Lindzi too, but I just like Kacie B. more. If she doesn’t get picked, his loss. She needs to be the next bachelorette, well after Emily of course. That is another one I can’t wait for. I hope you enjoyed your nap. :)

  17. I love your blog Ali! You have such good insight to what is going on since you have been in his shoes. I think Ben should listen to what the girls think about other women on the show. Although i think Emily shouldn’t have brought it back up a second time. In terms of Courtney, I think she is just in it to win it. I don’t think she really has true feelings for Ben. I will be so upset if he falls for her fakeness because kacie B and Ben would be a great couple! I have a question! Why are the girls suitcases so small but they have so many cute outfits?! I noticed that when Ben sent home elyse. Anyway, thanks for sharing!

  18. Ben can be a dick sometimes. I honestly believe Kasie B. will be better off 1) without him and 2), as our next Bachelorette. Ben proves selfish and insensitive, especially in the gruff manner in which he expelled the Chicago trainer (last night) and dumped the sweet blonde (last week), and in the words of my wife, “He’s not that cute.”

  19. I was really disappointed in Ben last night when he went skinny dipping with Courtney. To me, that seemed extremely selfish on Ben’s part because he clearly didn’t take any of the other women’s feelings into account. Ben better hope that the woman he chooses doesn’t leave him after she sees this episode. None of those women there deserve to be deceived like that!

  20. Most boring season ever! Ben was a poor choice as the bachelor! Thumbs down for Courtney!!!

  21. I think Courtney’s bipolar. Seriously. She scares me.

  22. Is it just me or have any of you noticed that there is never any talk between Ben and Courtney about their chemistry or how they feel about eachother?.. All she ever seems to say or care about is “winning”!!! She does not care about him. If he choses her he will be so disappointed later that he did not listen to the other ladies! Why???!!!!! Ahhh i cant stand her.

  23. Did anyone here at the end when they were asking for bachelors for the next bachelorett. For a Emily. Is it the same Emily from this season. Or is it a whole new Emily.
    I hope it is some one we don’t know and the drama is not the same.

  24. My take…..He proposes to Courtney and she turns him down. I just don’t understand why he is still keeping Casey S? She is just Courtney’s little follower. I really believe that he isn’t thinking with the head on his shoulders or following his heart. Whenever Courtney is shown on the tv I mute the sound. I can’t stand her.

  25. To tell you the truth, I don’t think Ben is in this for the right reasons either. It’s all gottn pretty shallow.

  26. I have to agree with the above comment about Kacie B. being better off without Ben. She is much too sweet for him. I find Ben to be very condescending when he communicates with the women, but especially when he has spoken to Emily each time she has tried to warn him about Courtney. Other than having a nice body, Ben is certainly not all that.

  27. I totally agree with Jana…I said the same thing!!! If its not Courtney that he chooses I bet his fiance right now is pist and it may even be a end breaker! Sucks that Ben did that what disrespect for all the other girls, I would be discusted knowing that he did that with someone else and then I was with him after. WOW. Ben lost alot of respect from me last night….I really thought he had more morals and everything then that!

  28. I feel Ben is just infatuated with Courtney and her looks, looking past her nasty additude towards the other ladies. It’s weird because, he will sit there and say that he is watching the watching the way the girls interact together and then so quick to send people home because, they are not being team players but, he then gets warned about Courtney and doesn’t even look into it and makes poor Emily feel like she did something wrong. I felt really bad for her that was wrong. Ben comes off and wants this image as this down to earth sweet, hometown boy looking for a sweet loving woman but, he keeps sending those home. Courtney will never be the type to move to Bens hometown and be the wine makers wife on the farm. She’s a city girl who travels all over the world for work and she is def very high maintenance. The skinny dipping was so sleezy, I’m pretty sure Bens mom wouldnt approve of that behavior. To me it seems Ben is starting to be very short with the other girls and does not look at all interested in most of them anymore when he is with them one on one. It just tells he’s already made his choices . That’s the thing I really do not like about this show is that you only have what like 8 weeks to get to know 20 girls or guys and then just a few hours each Time you take one out. That’s not enough time to get to know someone enough to say you want to marry them. Once he or she has a connection with a few others , like anyone else would you want to see that person all the time and that stops you from choosing others that are just sitting waiting for a date . Then when it’s finally their turn the shows been going on for like a month and the bachelor or bachlorette already has such strong connections and such little time that Its not worth it to them to get to know someone else that they may have a great connection with, but they will never know cause there is not enough time. Then your excpected to ask the chosen one to marry you……. It’s ridiculous ! It doesn’t mean that’s their soul mate it just meens that, that person was the one he or she got the most time with, which made that he a quicker connection . It doesn’t mean love, their soul mate could have been one of the bunch they had no time to get to know and walked right out the door. In Bens case it could have been the one on one date he sent home last night. Just a true thought. I don’t like Courtney, she is all wrong for him and will not fit on his world . I’m really disappointed this season.

  29. You know, I’ve only every watched 4 seasons (Ali your’s was one I watched entirely) of this show in full length and it’s because of how 1) the bachelor/bachelorette acts around people or treats them and 2) there’s usually someone who is completely not in it, except to win it and they just create so many problems and are the “main choice” So I only tune in for bits and pieces. What I’ve seen of this Courtney gal is insane. The first time I saw her she said how did that taste coming from your mouth…this most recent time I was appauled. If you have to get naked and run around like a hoodrat then you’re not only being a skank-a-saurus, but you’re selling your qualties short. Just my opinion. Ick on Courtney.

  30. Ben should definitely have gone skinny dipping with Courtney if he wanted to. This is about HIM finding love not the other women.

  31. I actually disagree with the feeling that one of Ben’s top three is Lindzi. My theory is that she wasn’t that great at Baseball, so to make the teams more even and more competitive against each other, he took out the weakest player. I just don’t see the chemistry there between them at all!

  32. I’m pretty sure it’s going to be Courtney and Kacie B. in the end. Let’s hope that Ben chooses the right girl.

  33. In regards to Kacie B winning…maybe it WILL be here. I remember Brad and Emily’s season and it was so obvious the whole time he had fallen for her. All the intimate one on one time he found for her, the impromptu wine picnic before the rose ceremony, etc. Which is why I was so upset that she reacted to watching the show the way she did. And why I think if he DID pick Kacie, she will truly be devastated by the skinny dipping and (…..) Heck, anyone would.

  34. Any man who would go skinny dipping with a girl on national TV, when he knows the other girls he was seeing at the time would actually see it later, is a jerk. The only excuse would be if he was already 100% sure that Courtney is the one; and even then it shows weak character. Ben has made himself look like a fool. And as far as Little Miss Winning is concerned, any man who end up with her better keep a close eye on his “package” because she’s the type who will cut it off and eat it for desert!

  35. Well, I think many of us had the case of OMG’s last night. Screaming at the TV and throwing pillows. @ Melissa, I agree unless, Ben confessed before the show aired and she knew about it. That would have been right right thing to do. But, I am not sure.Ben has been on alot of shows lately and I saw him on Ellen. It’s hard to read Ben. You don’t know if he dumped her, if he kept her or what. I just hope he is smarter than he acted last night in that episode. It makes me sad. The bachelor/bachelorette is not as good as it used to be.

  36. He will definitely pick Courtney. He kind of has to now because no other girl is going to stick with him once they know. I am glad that he felt ashamed, he should!

  37. Oh Ali, I look forward to your blogs each week!
    You seem to sum it up exactly how I feel each week. Poor Emily, I just wanted to put tape over her mouth for her own sake. I really like her but I feel like she is digging her own grave, hope she doesn’t do it again. It would be so hard to keep quiet, but I do believe Courtney’s true colors will show before to long for Ben to see.

    So glad you had fun Cabo in with your girlies. You look like you had a ball. btw I love those swings at the bar (they were swings right) I live in Australia and one day I’ll get to Mexico, hopefully this year!

    Look forward to next week’s episode and of course your inner thoughts to follow :)

  38. Well said, Ali.

  39. that’s funny Connie, I agree with what you wrote.
    In my opinion, Ben showed he has zero couth with his agreeing to romp around el-nudo with Courtney.
    As for Courtney…she hasn’t shown that she has any class either; only that she has a nasty, unattractive disposition.
    shame shame
    They make the perfect couple.
    Glad you enjoyed Mexico, Ali.

  40. I feel Ben should really take a look at his predecessors and what they did and do the opposite of the numerous failures of the men and women.

  41. Ali, I have to say I agree with Emily trying to tell Ben what’s going on, I think we as women don’t want to see someone we care about treated that way. I am truly disappointed in Ben for skinny dipping with Courtney even if he is into her he should have turned her down out of respect for the other women. I disagree with the producers allowing her to see him in any fashion, especially that way. If they wanted to do that they should have given the other women the choice to leave, their fault if there was no show!

  42. I feel Ben should really take a look at his predecessors, and what they did. And do the opposite of the numerous failures of the men and women.

  43. I wanted Kacie B. to be Ben’s pick, but not any longer. She is way too good for Ben. She would be a very good choice for the next Bachelorette. The skinny dipping thing was very disgusting….I think the show should have told her “no”. Poor decision. Maybe Courtney and Ben belong together. He has been on numerous talk shows, and her career as an actress is her goal for sure.

  44. It’s pretty obvious why he will choose Courtney: because if he wasn’t the Bachelor, a beautiful woman wouldn’t look twice as him. Let’s face it – the guy is short, ugly and could seriously use some hairstyling before the show. I wouldn’t touch him with a ten foot pole. I have no clue what the Bachelor producers were thinking. I doubt too many American women want to watch a boring dude with a big nose every Monday night!

  45. I don’t think Ben is looking for love. He’s just looking for some promo for his winery! Give it a few months and it’s over between him and Courtney.
    She doesn’t give a dam for him either! Is anyone seriouly going to believe she was home dateless. Give me a break!

  46. It is unfortunate that the kind, sweet and genuine man we saw on the last Bachelorette is not the Ben we are seeing now.
    At no time has Courtney talked about having feelings for him, just how to take down the girls. They talk about nothing when they are together because she is just all over him and uses her sexuality to get what she wants (disgusting, she gives women a bad name.)
    I agree with those that feel Ben owes Emily a huge apology because shame on him to tell her to be careful.. Now she should have not accepted his rose..he is just not a real man at this point. He is acting like a HIgh School boy..

  47. Courtney is a piece of work and I do not see Ben with her. She is trouble and I can’t believe should would not give Ben trouble. Kacie B. or Lindzi, I think, would adjust well to Ben’s lifestyle. Emily is trying to warn Ben about Courtney and she is being honest. Good job, Emily.

  48. [...] Read more from Ali on…. [...]

  49. Ben, Ben…..not a smart move to go skinny dipping with Courtney, unless she is the ONE you have already decided you are picking! What a disgraceful way for you to treat the other women….not to mention how embarrassing it must have been for your Mother and family. No class what-so-ever, just thinking with your other head!

  50. Ben carried himself much differently (not better) after his time with Courtney in the ocean. He demonstrated that he did wrong. He will try to win possibly Kacey and Lindz but he will think back to the manipulation and what he has already done with Courtney. I feel that he looked ashamed walking into the rose ceremony. He has a stronger emotional connection with K, and a deeper physical connection with C. The physical connection trumped his morals with K. He’ll see how his physical and emotional connections will get with the other gals, but if he is still ashamed of what he has done with Courtney so early… it’ll be his choice. It’ll always sit in the back of his head. “Secrets” aren’t secrets when there are cameras around. He knows this. Courtney’s game knows this… Watch how he’s carrying himself around the other gals… Listen to the tempo and tone in his voice; it’s changed. It’s obvious. It’s sad for him that he’s going to miss out on someone that will add a positive realm to his life; not just physical. K & L demonstrate their maturity in relationships… Best to them!

  51. Why not send Rachel home? We all know he doesn’t like her!

    My one wish is for Jamie to get a date… Everyone seems to forget about her! She was my preseason pick :D

  52. Hi Ali-
    First of all thank you for writing this blog. I love hearing your insight because you actually lived the show. I am rooting for Kacie B. as well, I think she is genuine and sweet and I loved what Ben said to her when he said “you always get me to open up and you listen”

    I’m not a Courtney fan at all, but I think Emily is making a huge mistake by focusing on her. She’s making herself look bad in Ben’s eyes, and giving Courtney exactly what she wants. I think Ben’s attraction to Courtney is more physical than emotional, whereas, his connecton to Kacie B. and Lindzi are more emotional. I hope as Courtney watches herself she sees how mean and nasty she’s coming across, and hope that she isn’t as cruel as she appears to be.

    Look forward to your blog next week, and I hope you make an apperance on “The Women Tell Al l Special” and “After the Final Rose”

  53. Courtney reminds me way too much of Vienna Sausage–from Jake’s season. I sooo much more enjoy the Bachelorett more than Bachelor. Less “Cattiness” AND—Guys are not as MEAN to their “friends”. Still wishing YOU and Roberto would have made it—still one of my favorite seasons, and will FOREVER remember that final episode. :o (

  54. Love the blog! I love watching the show! It’s such an emotional roller coaster! I was surprised that it came down between Jennifer and Emily. And that Jennifer was sent on. I really liked her and thought it seemed like there was enough between them to explore more.
    Courtney is…hmmm…psychotic? She is so evil acting with her tucked in upper lip and crazy eyes. I told my husband that she seemed like the type who would kidnap and torture someone and have zero remorse! She is a spider. She is luring Ben in so beautifully though, it’s stunning to watch. I feel like I’m watching Single White Female when it’s their scene!! So, did they have sex? Is there any rule that bachelors/bachelorettes can’t do that? Are they doing it with all the people they like the most or what? If he had sex with her, which I cannot imagine 2 hot people, skinny dipping in a foreign country in a full moon NOT having SEX?! But IF they did: Ewww Ben. You suck. Your poor mama may watch this. For shame! ;)
    One last thing, I LOVE Kacie B. She is my top pick, then Lindzi, although I still don’t see the full connection there.

  55. I don’t think Ben is very serious about trying to find a wife, all he wants is have some fun!!! I’m pretty sure he’ll still choose Courtney despite all the warnings from the other girls. And it seems like he doesn’t know how to handle a lady.He barely comforted Elysa and just watched her cry, and was very rude to Emily….and he barely says anything during his dates for that matter :S Pfff can’t wait to watch Emily in The Bachelorette ! :)

  56. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Ben & Courtney are 100% engaged. Honestly, I don’t think that they could edit anything she says to make her look nice. And after that episode, I wouldn’t want to be bringing Courtney home to family dinner. Seriously, Ben’s momma got to see her skinny dipping on tv … Great start to the end of a psychotic relationship. “Winning!”. Ugh! I hate her. And sorry, but a Ben isn’t fortunate in the looks dept either ….

  57. After the show last night, Courtney and Ben belong together. The other women are to good for him. I really was hoping that Kacie B. would be the one but she can do better.

  58. Ali, LOVE hearing your insights on all this. You are a beautiful, amazing woman and your season was by far my favorite!

    Now as for Ben….I think he is pretty easy to read. I think you could tell very early on who he was into and who he was not. I feel bad for Jennifer because I think she was a really sweet girl but I was just not seeing much chemistry there. She deserves SO much better then him. Kacie B is BY FAR the best girl there-love her! I actually hope he does NOT choose her and she goes on to find someone who actually is worth her time and deserves her! I would love to see her on a future Bachelorette. I think in the end he and Courtney will end up together. After Monday night, I think they deserve each other. She obviously only cares about winning. The whole skinny dipping scenario was all about a lack of decency and respect! Both Ben and Courtney showed that they not only do not respect the other women there but they do not respect themselves or each other. The fact that he said he felt a little bad afterwards shows that he knows he made a mistake. He is sending girls home for not being open and honest with them. How many times has he said he wants openness and honesty and then he goes off and does that! I think it would be great if Ben AND Courtney could show some openness and honesty for once. They don’t even have real conversations with each other or really talk about anything. If I found out that the skinny dipping (and who KNOWS what else) went on, I would wait until the rose ceremony, refuse the rose, and tell everyone why. To all you lovely ladies who went home, Do not shed one more tear over Ben and thank your lucky stars you did not end up with him!

    On a different note….My husband is an editor/cameraman for a TV show and I know A LOT can be twisted in the filming, editing and putting together of shows. SO….If this is the show that is just making Ben and Courtney look bad then SHAME ON THEM!!! Ben and Courtney, if this is your true colors then SHAME ON YOU!!

  59. So about the next Bachelorette…It is Emily, not a new one, or the one from this season, but the Emily from Brad’s season with the kid and the dead rally driver fiance.

    And as Ali said she didn’t even know Emily’s name until this episode… isn’t she the nerdy girl he had one on one date at the beginning of the season??

  60. Ben definitely does not come across as a man looking for a wife. He has his reasons for being the bachelor, foremost of which is he’s a dude! Few dudes would turn down the chance to cavort with 20 beautiful women. Remember, he started kissing on the first show. Courtney is perfect for what he’s looking for … hot time in the old town tonight.

    Seriously, if he really wanted to find love, he’d be looking at the women differently. And he certainly wouldn’t be stupid enough to go skinny dipping on his way to the altar.

    If he truly is looking for a wife, I pity him. He’s not mature enough to be a husband, and women with half a brain will see that eventually.

    I think he’s cute, but that HAIR. Yech. I’d have helped him do a makeover asap.

  61. Ali Fedotowsky is desperate for attention. You are a FAUXLEBRITY and not a CELEBRITY. Sorry I was ever a fan of yours. I don’t like fakeness! You are trying to be best friends with Adrienne Curry who is bipolar. Anyone in their right mind would stay far away from her because of her whorish reputation & filthy mouth! You remind me of a immature 14 year old seeking attention. Who is giving you advice about your career? They are telling you wrong! You tweet those ugly pictures of yourself trying to get more fans to subscribe to your fan page is ridiculous. A lot of people are saying negative things about how you used your fans to help yourself in an attempt to obtain celebrity status. You are very immature to be 27 years old. Other lead bachelorettes seemed to have their priorities in place. A lot of people who once was a fan no longer like you. People would respect you more if you were quiet and not trying to draw so much attention to yourself to become a star. People are tired and sick of you Ali trying to keep your face in front of the cameras!

  62. Wow- Mary and Jan are a little psycho, ya think? So jealous. I mean really, if I were “tired and sick of Ali” I certainly wouldn’t be reading her blog. The rudeness of people shocks and amuses me.

    Thanks for your blog, Ali. Always great to read insight from someone who has been there.

  63. I was in shock about the skin dip..,
    I love Kacie B but feels she doesnt belong to a guy like Ben.., shame on him, Lindzi is my second choice…,

  64. I’m not a psychologist, but I think there is a serious link missing in this girl Courtney… narcissistic egomaniac comes to mind….don’t think someone who loves themselves this much could possibly love someone else in any true sense of the word. Seems to me that Ben is enjoying this experience to the max, all this attention has changed him. I hope I’m wrong, but if I’m right he’s not ready to find “the one”…he needs to find that wonderful humility we all loved about him in the last show. Just sayin’

  65. I am sorry, but I don’t think it’s fair or accurate to character what Ben did was just what most men would do in that situation. He is NOT just any guy as Michael S. put it so well in his blog, he’s the BACHELOR dating several other women on national TV. He’s the guy asking those women to be “honest” w/ him and open their hearts to him and put it on the line. He gave no respect and he admitted himself, no thought to them even. He definitely wasn’t honest w/ them b/c he knew if he told them and was “honest” with them then all the ones w/ self respect would have left. If Jake did that w/ Vienna, would you have stayed? Not just any woman – Vienna? I think Ben is a frat boy and too immature, selfish and thoughtless to deserve Kacie B, Lindzi or Jennifer type. It’s so disrespectful to both men and women to make it seem as if what he did would be what most men would do in THAT situation – remember in 23 other seasons, no man or woman have done that for a reason.

    If she was the only one a guy was dating in real life of course and in private, but this was a speed dating situation where he needed to have given the women he asked to be vulnerable to him a fair chance. Courtney as despicable as she is, was correct – at that point it was “game over” for everyone else. She won the show w/ that stunt and they deserve each other. I think some people take the notion of let’s not judge anyone too far – it means don’t look down at others b/c of looks, status, education, superficial reasons; it does NOT mean let’s not show outrage or disapproval when someone acts without morals or compassion to others that lead to others getting hurt.

  66. I am sorry, but I don’t think it’s fair or accurate to character what Ben did was just what most men would do in that situation. He is NOT just any guy as Michael S. put it so well in his blog, he’s the BACHELOR dating several other women on national TV. He’s the guy asking those women to be “honest” w/ him and open their hearts to him and put it on the line. He gave no respect, and he admitted himself, no thought to them even. He definitely wasn’t honest w/ them b/c he knew if he told them and was “honest” with them then all the ones w/ self respect would have left. If Jake did that w/ Vienna, would you have stayed? To top it off, not just any woman – Vienna? I think Ben is a frat boy and too immature, selfish and thoughtless to deserve Kacie B, Lindzi or Jennifer type. It’s so disrespectful to both men and women to make it seem as if what he did would be what most men would do in THAT situation – remember in 23 other seasons, no man or woman have done that for a reason.

    If she was the only one a guy was dating in real life of course and in private, but this was a speed dating situation where he needed to have given the women he asked to be vulnerable to him a fair chance. Courtney as despicable as she IS, was correct – at that point it was “game over” for everyone else. She won the show w/ that stunt and they deserve each other. I think some people take the notion of let’s not judge anyone too far – it means don’t look down at others b/c of looks, status, education, and other superficial reasons; it does NOT mean let’s not show outrage or disapproval when someone acts without morals or compassion to others that lead to others getting hurt.

  67. Ali, I hope your right about Kacie B., I think she is such a genuine lady. Courtney is dangerous and I think will continue to make all the ladies of the house hate her until her departrure. Which I hope is soon. :) I do hope that Ben eventuallyh sees through her. I enjoy your blogs each week, keep up the great work. :)

  68. I am shocked that Ben doesn’t care about what the other girls think about Courtney. Wouldn’t you want to be with someone who is nice to everyone? That’s true beauty.

  69. Ali I just want to say that the noter Jan Gouws doesn’t know what she is talking about. You are a wonderful person and everyone loves you here. This womans jealousy is showing. I love your blog and please continue to write here

    I am with everyone here Courtney has to go. I wonder if she is a plant to stir things up.

  70. The two most beautiful girls this season are Jamie and Kacie S.! Too bad they never talk, we never see a single clip with them. Ben is BORING, he never says anything of interest whatsoever, he is arrogant, condescending and clearly very shallow. And ugly, I can’t for the life of me understand what these women see in him! Hope he ends up with Courtney, they deserve each other! Kacie B. is just annoying, don’t see why you guys like her!

  71. I just love Jennifer B. comment. :-)

  72. I was disappointed in Ben this week. Not only did he show disrespect for the other women and complete disregard for their feelings by going skinny dipping (and, I think, more) with Courtney, I thought that he was also incredibly disrespectful to Emily. His threat, “Be careful and tread lightly” after she was trying to warn him about Courtney was absolutely unacceptable! That’s not how you talk to someone you’re in a relationship with if they say something you don’t like! He also hasn’t been shown asking the women questions of depth! (His favorite question seems to be about past relationships) We are getting pretty far along in the season and I don’t feel like I know much about a lot of the women aside from how they interact with the others in the house. I wonder if Ben even really knows them!

  73. The thought came to me too that Courtney might be a plant in the show to stir up trouble with the other girls. It’s really sad to see Ben being manipulated by Courtney. Do they talk about their relationship in a loving way off camera? There is no evidence of love on camera for B and C. I think Ben gets rid of her next week. or this might be wishful thinking. It doesn’t seem that Ben is really ready for any type of serious relationship/marriage. I predict Ben will break up with whomever he chose soon if he hasn’t already. I’m not so sure that Ben was a good choice for this season anymore. I’m disappointed in Ben.

  74. Thanks for your blog Ali! These girls who are hating on you are just jealous. You are beautiful on the inside and out, continue doing what you do. I also love Kacie B., she is my only favorite and the only one I can actually see Ben with in the long run!

  75. Well I’m a man and I love to watch both the bachelor and bachelorette. I like it from a psychology aspect of seeing how men and women differ.
    This season we have some very catty women…Blakeley- Cortney- That bi-sexual gal I forget her name- Jacklyn to name a few.
    Nicki- Well I read online she just came out of a divorce less then a year i think it is a bit too soon for her to settle down with a new husband..she needs to be foot loose and fancy free for some time.
    Emily- Cute gal. I like her also. She is the more logical one of the buch and was the only one who treated Shawntel with a bit of respect on episode 3.
    Kacie B- Cute, free spirited, very loveable..just cries too much, and always needs reassurance. If Ben picks her he better carry around with him a box of Kleenex’s.
    Cortney- She is funny! She has great one liners like this week ” Blackley is a maniac at baseball, I didnt know strippers could play baseball like that” Haaa! If anything she is entertaining, not only on the eyes but also witty. Yeah i do agree a long term relationship with her wouldn’t last. And if Ben does want a wife Cortney isn’t the best candidate.
    Lindzi- I think the best pick for him, she is a farmer also just like him. More on Ben’s level. And she is pretty! She looked so good in SF on their 1-1.
    Jennifer- Boring! Her date with Ben was so boring! You could see he is just bored with her.

  76. I think Ben should pick Courtney, they deserve each other! The other girls are too good for him. after the skinny dipping episode, it confirms that he and Courtney don’t respect all the girls involved. He’s supposedly there to find his “wife” not for cheap flings. The skinny dipping thing could have been saved for a more private time, like after the show was over. Plus what kind of impression is he giving about Courtney acting out what is supposed to be intimate moments in front of the cameramen. No respect!

  77. I agree with Ali and many of you. I cannot stand Courtney. I think she is very mean, fake and manipulative. I understand there is editing to add the drama, but no matter what editing is done sheis still saying the words no matter what the context. I also cannot stand the “winning” comments. I feel like she is just on the show to prove something and to show she can win it regardless of her actual feelings for Ben. To me, she seems like another Bentley from Ashley’s season. I love, love, love Kacie B but I’m not sure she ends up with Ben unfortunately. I also agree that this season remind’s me of Jake’s season and the “nice girls” didn’t do so well. I don’t dislike Lindzi, but I haven’t completely warmed up to her. I’ve like Jamie from the beginning, but I don’t think he’s feeling her. And I loved Jennifer and it was so hard to see her so devastated. However, I think she’ll be just fine. It reminds me of Tenley, and she is doing great noe and has found love. I also really like Emily, but I feel like hedge is screwing herself over by bringing up the Courtney thing. I understand why she’s doin it, and I probably would too. However, Courtney has such a hold on him that I don’t think it matters why anyone says. However, it should be interesting next week to see more girls tell him about Courtney. I feel like they have to back Emily up so she doesn’t look like she’s just jealous or starting trouble. I think this season will be very interesting and surprising from here on out. I have liked Ben since the Bachelorette but I lost so much respect for him with the skinny dipping thing. I really hope I don’t lose the rest of my respect for him if he chooses Courtney the way Jake chose Vienna. We all know how thy turned out!

  78. I so wish Emily had told Ben….”I’m outta here…good luck with your endeavors” after he so rudely scolded her. He showed he’s a class a jerk. I would have smiled and politely excused myself. The girls I watched this with were screaming at the TV for her to stand by her principle and never let a man speak to her like that, when she was nothing but sweet. He all but wagged his finger in her face. Disgusting!

  79. I don’t get why so many people are convinced that whoever he chooses would leave him when she saw that he went skinny dipping with another woman. Bachelors and Bachelorettes usually go to the “fantasy suite” and spend the night with three different people! I would feel much worse about that–knowing he had spent the night with two other women.

  80. The ones I’d peg for the top now would be Nicki, Kacie B., and Courtney.

  81. Maybe the reason they keep putting in the Winning comments is so we can all laugh when she gets sent packing. I’m sure if he didn’t pick Courtney in the end, whoever he did choose, he did tell her ahead of time about the skinny dipping. Don’t forget he has no commitment to any of these girls at this point and what happens between him and each one of them is part of the show, its what happens after the final rose and if they can make the relationship work then. Courtney would be considered just another fling before settling down. She is probably hoping Playboy will contact her…oh forgot no boobs. The guys will be standing in line now if not for anything but to go skinny dipping with her. She will realize her mistake then…or maybe not.

  82. Hannah, a lot couples do not have sex there – that’s private time to talk. The ones who do have sex there never build trust and the relationship usually end pretty quickly (maybe why most of relationships do not make it for very long on this show). There are men and women who have the maturity to be self-disciplined and have respect for themselves and for each other. What Ben did is a deal breaker for any woman with self worth and self respect (other than Courtney of course). Anyone who says otherwise, is in fact proving my point.

  83. I was hoping and praying that Ben and Ashley would hook up last season … but now that Ben is the Bachelor and gets to pick a bride, I’m thinking he is pretty much being seduced by Courtney. Just imagine if you had the opportunity to go skinny dipping with Ben! He has a very nic body and a good heart to boot! His good heart was evident from when he was painting the mural for the kids … remember that episode? So anyone who has been watching and following this, as I’m sure Courtney must have, knows how to take advantage of Ben. Courtney is beautiful, hot and sexy. Obviously she has been around the block and knows all it takes is a little wine for the wine maker and she can get into his pants and have her way with him. OMG, she even got him out of his pants on the Bachelor and went skinny dipping! What else you think happened? A girl can steal a guys heart and sex makes it very easy for someone like Ben, who obviously seems very attracted to Courtney and a bit naive when it comes to relationships. Else why would he risk doing this? He knows if he makes it with Courtney that pretty much gives her more than just a silly rose! She basically wins his heart! That is the prize, folks, winning Ben’s heart, even if Courtney has to break all the rules to do it. She is a model and obviously wants the fame and fortune that being on the Bachelor will bring her down the road. Plus a girl like her would be doing pretty good to get a man like Ben as her sugar daddy husband should they marry. But even if that does not happen, Courtney has won a part of his heart if not it all. Sure, maybe he will one day wake up and realize that the other girls were more classy or had better upbringing. But I think there is something to be said by that old adage that guys don’t always follow their heads … they get led around by their other heads. :-)

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