Top 10 Turkey Traumas

Turkey Traumas, Continued

A newlywed couple's parents arrived for their first Thanksgiving meal. One of the dads noticed the turkey thawing in the sink, with a dish drainer and a rubber mat resting on top of it. Her dad inquired why she was thawing the turkey that way. She said that that was the way her mom always thawed the bird. The mother said, "Well, yes, but you don't have a cat who's going to try to eat it!"

A woman from Colorado called to get advice on how to thaw her frozen turkey. She proudly shared the fact that her turkey was stored in a snow bank outside! But it had snowed again the night before, and it dawned on her that she didn't have a clue which snow bank her turkey was in. At that point, she ended the conversation to go find her turkey.

A proud gentleman called to tell the staff how he wrapped his turkey in a towel and stomped on it several times, breaking the bones so it would fit in his pan.

Another gentleman called to tell the operator he cut his turkey in half with a chain saw and wanted to know if the oil from the chain would adversely affect the turkey.

A woman cooking Thanksgiving dinner for the first time called for help because her mother said she was tired of cooking, and it was time her daughter learned how to prepare the Thanksgiving meal. The woman was in her 70s.

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Originally published on LHJ.com, November 2008.