"He's So Needy, It's Making Me Crazy"

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His Turn, continued

"After my divorce I threw myself into my teaching and used my spare time to paint. I've shown my work locally, but my dream is to someday have a show at a gallery on Newbury Street in Boston. I dated occasionally but nothing serious. I figured I'd never remarry.

"Then my friend Joe, the shop teacher at school, said he wanted to set me up with Marlene, whose son Carl is friends with Joe's son. I was a little intimidated because she's this hot-shot lawyer but I was definitely interested.

"Joe didn't tell her who her date was, but I wanted her to know. So I sent roses. That first night, we talked for hours and when I dropped her off, I got brave enough to kiss her good night. Oh man, my socks melted! I knew right then and there I wanted to marry her. Three months later, I proposed and she was ecstatic over the ring I designed. Everything seemed perfect.

"But it hasn't played out that way. Look, I'm willing to change. If it matters that much, I'll straighten up the kitchen and clean out the gutters. But how do I deal with the fact that she wants nothing to do with me? The other night she went up to bed to read, so I got a book and came up to bed, too. She let out a huge sigh. Jeez. I'm her husband! I live in the same house. I sleep in the same bed.

"Our sex life is our toughest problem, of course. The other day I got out a sex video she bought a while back and studied it. But watching just gave me an anxiety attack. All I could think about is how inadequate I am. I'd hate to lose Marlene, and I'd also hate not to be a regular part of her kids' lives, especially Carl. I missed out on fathering my own daughter, so I'm grateful for this small second chance with a stepson. Even so, maybe I should just go back to being good old Mr. Wilson, the hermit."

Continued on page 5:  The Counselor's Turn

 

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