"I Can't Stand to Have Him Touch Me!"

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His Turn

"Melissa is very intelligent and creative, whether she's designing her jewelry or playing with our children. And she's beautiful, too. I love all those qualities, but I have to admit that one of the things that attracted me to her in the first place was that she bragged about all the sex she was having in college," said Jim, 34. "She was a wild woman and proud of it. She was 22 and a senior in college and I was 25. I'd just been dumped by my high school sweetheart -- someone I'd been with since I was 15 years old. My friends encouraged me to go to a party to get back into circulation, and Melissa was there. I gravitated to her right away, attracted by both her beauty and her bubbliness. Before long she was telling me about all the guys she'd slept with, who seemed to number in the dozens. I was frankly intrigued by this -- it was such an exciting contrast to my own long-term, monogamous relationship -- and I got her phone number and called the next day.

"I kissed her on our second date. I was nervous because she was so much more experienced than I was, but she seemed fine with what I was doing. About a month later, we had sex for the first time and, again, she seemed satisfied. She was kind of passive, actually. I was surprised because I thought that with all her experience she'd take more initiative. But after that first time, she was always ready. That was so great! We had a good time out of bed, too. We're both into backpacking and camping and we love to read. We'd get into these intense, terrific discussions about books. After a year of dating, I proposed and we got married a year after that.

"The first three years of our marriage were great. Melissa never said no and we actually had sex five or six times a week. And we had lots of time for each other. She started her own jewelry business after a year of working for another designer, which meant she could make her own hours. I got home early from my job as a guidance counselor and had school vacations and summers off."

Continued on page 3:  His Turn, continued


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