"I Can't Turn Him On"
Her TurnWaning Chemistry
"Why isn't Lane turned on by me? It's been 8 months since we last made love -- successfully, that is. We've tried a few times, but he loses his erection. Then he goes to sleep, while I lie there confused and frustrated. Also, I'm the only one who initiates sex these days; if I didn't, nothing would happen. Lane never makes a move. He just sits in front of the TV all night.
"It didn't used to be this way. From the moment Lane and I met, we had amazing chemistry. Up until this problem started, we had a fantastic sex life, making love three or four times a week. Lane used to surprise me by whisking me off to a hotel for romantic weekends.
"When I found Lane, I thought I'd hit the jackpot. He was a sensual, caring lover who took pleasure in making sure I was satisfied. I think his artistic nature is part of the reason he's so good in bed. He works for his father's import-export business, but his real passion is music. On weekends, he plays drums with a band, and he's quite good.
"I don't have a clue as to how this problem started. Everything seemed to fall apart one night when we were having sex and Lane couldn't finish. Insisting nothing was the matter, he turned on the TV, and that has been the story of our lives ever since. He just has no interest anymore. I've told him more than once that I don't want to be celibate the rest of my life."We Barely Touch Each Other Anymore"
"I get so jealous when we're out with our couple friends. The way they giggle and cuddle, you can just tell they have no problems in the bedroom. We're supposed to be going on a cruise with some of them in a few months, but I don't want to watch them dance, hold hands, and stroll on the deck when Lane and I barely even touch each other anymore.
"I get especially upset when I see my friend Marnie, who's pregnant. Her husband, Ted, looks at her adoringly and touches her belly, and they look so intimate and loving that I want to cry. Now that I'm turning 30, I really want to start our family soon. But the way things are going, that may not be biologically possible. I even said that to Lane the other night, and he just stormed out to the garage and played his drums for hours. The next morning, I told him that if he doesn't find me attractive anymore, maybe we should split up. His response, as always, was silence.
"But I guess it's a good sign that Lane agreed to counseling. When I told him I was taking us to see a marriage counselor, he said he wanted a session alone before our joint session. If he doesn't show up for his appointment, I want a divorce."