"We Got Married Too Young"

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His Turn, continued

"Just before my graduation, my guilt started to get the better of me. Julie is smart, and I wished she could be doing something with her life. Also, I knew I hadn't been a big part of my daughter's childhood. The way I had been acting had kept me from doing much with Megan. So I went home that night to talk to Julie and make some changes.

"Before I could open my mouth, Julie said she wanted a divorce. That broke my heart. I told her I would never mention West Point again, and that I'd get a good job and work hard for her and Megan. I also said I wanted us to have another baby. I know that sounds crazy, but I thought it would save our marriage. 

"Bad move. We were both overjoyed when our son Timothy was born, but a new baby just made everything even more stressful for Julie. She started eating more and gained a ton of weight. Our sex life nearly disappeared. Even so, we got pregnant again. 

"So now it's round three -- another baby and the same old fights. Leo is a really cute kid, just like Megan and Timothy, but Julie is overwhelmed with taking care of three little ones. I can't stand listening to her complain, so I've fallen back into my old avoidance thing, staying out late and not being there for my family. I know it's wrong, but I can't stop myself. Is this marriage hopeless? Are we ever going to escape this vicious circle?"

Continued on page 5:  The Counselor's Turn


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