Will He Cheat On Me?

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Your Sex Life No Longer Sizzles

Just because your marriage doesn't resemble a Harlequin Romance is no excuse for your husband to cheat. But the fact is that a man is more tempted to look elsewhere when the lovemaking at home is less frequent or exciting than he prefers. Even if you think your lovelife is okay, he may not. (Think of the scene in Annie Hall where Diane Keaton and Woody Allen disagree on whether having sex three times a week equals "all the time" or "hardly ever.") "For many men, sex is the way they connect to their wives," says Glass. "So a husband may take rejection personally and feel his wife is implicitly giving him permission to be with other women."

Still, a man won't necessarily seek out a new partner, but if the opportunity presents itself--say, he's propositioned on a business trip--he may be inclined to accept. "A lot of men who wouldn't initiate a relationship are not prepared to say no, either," says Pepper Schwartz, PhD, a sociology professor at the University of Washington, in Seattle, and author of Everything You Know About Love and Sex Is Wrong (Putnam, 2000). "And afterward, he may decide to see this woman again because she was dynamite in bed."

Case in point: Serena, 31, who dated a married man several years ago. "His wife had lost interest in sex--or so he said," she says. "The truth is, I think he really did love his wife, and if there had been anything going on in their bedroom, he probably wouldn't have gotten involved with me."

Continued on page 3:  You've Just Had a Baby


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