Rev Up Your Sex Life
Is It Time for Help?
If you don't think that a sexy movie and some time away from the kids and the bills is going to rev up your sex life, there may be other factors underlying your flagging libido. Here's what to do to get to the bottom of the problem.
Rule out medical issues. If you've had a baby recently, give yourself a break. For some women, it can take a year or more to adjust to shifting hormonal levels that interfere with arousal, especially if they're nursing.
Consider medications. If you're taking antidepressants, ask your doctor about sexual side effects; many antidepressants suppress arousal. Perhaps your doctor can help you find a different medication.
Get at underlying emotional issues. Anger and resentment toward your spouse can deal a blow to your sexual relationship. In that case, the two of you may need couples therapy. Important point: If you and your spouse have issues to work out, you need to do it together. Individual therapy is fine, but you may also need to find someone you can both talk to, says Zoldbrod.
Consider sex therapy. If you feel your relationship is fine except for the sex, you may want to seek out a certified sex therapist. While a marriage counselor or therapist can talk about your sex life too, a certified sex therapist is more specialized in getting to the emotional roots of sexual issues couples have. To find one, go to the Web site of the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists or the American Board of Sexology. Note: Most sex therapists are also marital therapists.