3 Reasons Diane Lane Is Smiling

One, she's starring in a hot summer movie. Two, she's learning to stay strong when life gets tough. Three, that dress she's wearing? It's fantastic! Read on as Diane shares how she's made it through difficult times and learned to find joy in the little things.

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When Diane Lane sat down to write her bucket list recently, she surprised even herself. "I filled four pages handwritten, with no spaces," she says. "Four pages!" Among the highlights: Build a really cool tree house, visit the great earth drawings in Peru, do a handstand away from the wall and hold it for more than a second, and write a fan letter to Aretha Franklin. "I need to get started on this list right away," says Lane with a laugh. "I've got a lot of living to do."

Of course, at 48 Lane has already had an extraordinary life. The daughter of an acting coach and nightclub singer (her parents split up when she was a baby), Lane toured the world as a child actor, dying on stage night after night in a troupe that specialized in Greek tragedies. As an adult she settled in Hollywood, making such memorable films as A Walk on the Moon, Unfaithful (for which she received an Oscar nomination), and, most recently, the summer blockbuster Man of Steel. Along the way she has had some personal setbacks: Lane and her husband of eight years, actor Josh Brolin, filed for divorce in February. And last year her L.A. home became an empty nest after her daughter, Eleanor (from a previous marriage to actor Christopher Lambert), and Brolin's daughter, Eden (also from a previous marriage), started college in New York City. But she's facing these challenges as she's faced many others: with an open heart and mind. In a conversation that is both free-ranging and thoughtful, Lane talks about staying resilient and how she finds joy, especially in the small stuff.

HOW ARE YOU DEALING WITH BEING AN EMPTY NESTER?

I recently apologized to my daughter for my behavior during the first Thanksgiving that she came home from college. I didn't want to pick her up at the airport, and I was angry with her when she was home and had no reason to be. I finally got to the root of the issue, and it was very simple: I didn't want to say good-bye to her again. Then I realized, "Oh, I have to say good-bye thousands of times." That's part and parcel of the relationship now. That's what it was like for me and my mother. Every time I'd drive away from her we would both tear up. It's the bittersweet reality of life.

YOU STARTED ACTING AT SUCH A YOUNG AGE. WERE YOU ALWAYS CERTAIN THAT YOU WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR?

I did have a crossroads moment in my life. I'd gotten accepted into a very competitive school, Hunter College High School. But then I got an offer to do a play. I didn't want to do the play. I wanted to go to this school. I had this notion I would become a legislator. Anyway, I felt forced into doing the play. My dad believed that I could pull off doing both. And I did, for a while. Then I got an offer to work with Laurence Olivier in Paris [for the 1979 film A Little Romance]. I felt like I couldn't miss that opportunity -- it was like winning the lottery. Isn't it interesting how one thing leads to another? Had I not done that play, maybe I'd be working for Hillary Clinton right now. And that would be just fine.

JUST CURIOUS: IF YOU WERE WORKING ON LEGISLATION TODAY, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR TOP PRIORITIES?

Equal pay for women and prison reform.

OF COURSE YOU WENT ON TO HAVE A SUCCESSFUL CAREER. MAN OF STEEL IS A BIG MOVIE. IS THAT FUN FOR YOU?

It's funny when you do a film like this. There's so much secrecy -- just to read the script they pretty much lock you in a room! But I don't aim for that level of success all the time -- that's not my priority. It's what happens between the director yelling "action" and "cut" that I love the most.

WHAT KIND OF A ROLE DO FEMALE FRIENDS PLAY IN YOUR LIFE? ARE YOU ABLE TO SPEND TIME WITH THEM?

A lot of my friendships go back so long we've stopped mentioning how long it is. I have friends from when I was in school and from my 20s. I don't think anything can define the bond that women have. It's one of the great perks of being female. But there were years where I missed the closeness of my female buddies -- because of work, because of family. That's been a gift lately, the floodgates opening.

ARE YOU REFERRING TO THE SUPPORT THEY'VE GIVEN YOU THROUGH YOUR DIVORCE? HOW ARE YOU DOING?

"Fine" -- that's a four-letter word [smiles]. I'm doing very humanly.

HOW DO YOU STAY RESILIENT THROUGH A TIME LIKE THIS?

It's about momentum, like riding a bicycle. If you stop you fall over. So I keep pedaling. The key is having an appetite for going toward the light. When the light is harder to find you have to pedal even harder.

SO WHAT'S THAT "PEDALING" BEEN LIKE FOR YOU: ARE YOU SLEEPING, NOT SLEEPING, MEDITATING, CRYING?

I don't think you've said anything that's not on the list [laughs]. Aside from contraband, I'm pretty much open to the entire light-filled universe. So I go where the love is. Go toward encouragement. One day's worth -- that's all I ever have to accomplish. That has helped me, too. One sunrise to one sunset. Some mornings I even beat the sun. I was never naturally a morning person but that's changed and I love it. It's interesting: Blessings come in disguise. And challenges can be a blessing.

WHAT ELSE ARE YOU DOING TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF?

I've been doing yoga for 18 years. I've been painting, lately en plein air -- which is a challenge, because the light changes. The shadows keep moving. But any chance I can have to stop and smell a rose is great. Or watch an earthworm. Just walking in the woods heals my mind and heart.

IS ONE OF THE THINGS ON YOUR BUCKET LIST TO WRITE A MEMOIR? YOU'D HAVE A LOT TO OFFER.

Yes and no. Maybe I should write a book and say that no one else can read it until a certain date, the way that Jackie Kennedy did. But the great thing about being alive is that more will be revealed.

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